Couple of updates

I did forget to update on how Akila's date night went- it was super FUN! We went out to dinner, and then to Cinderella at Children's Theatre, which was my favorite play I have ever seen there- I highly recommend it! It was absolutely hilarious and very entertaining for Michael and I as adults, and for Akila.

Akila was very well behaved during dinner, the play and our trip to Target for her to pick out a toy. This is the routine on date night for each kid, dinner, an event and a toy. She was also good for about the first 10 minutes after we got home, and then the junky behavior kicked in. But a few hours of joy with her were really appreciated and needed.

She also did come home on Thursday with mascara and eye liner on, thankfully that is all she had brought to school so she wasn't into the full fledged hooker look. My make up has found a new hiding spot, and hopefully it will last for a few months before she finds it.

Make up

That title could have several different meanings. But I am going to talk about facial make up. Akila loves it, is obsessed with it, and when she gets her hands on it, usually ends up looking like a hooker. I always have to hide mine. It has been in a drawer in the bathroom underneath some towels for about a month. I always have to find a new hiding spot. I could lock it up in the kitchen or something, but our little gun safe is pretty full already.

I was doing a short training on customer service to front desk staff this morning at Children's Clinic and I needed to leave shortly after I got the kids on the bus. I had done everything but put make up on before they left. I have only been wearing make up regularly for about 4 years. My mom was big into make up and not leaving the house without it on, especially lipstick. I still can't handle lip stick, but as I have gotten older, I have learned the benefits of make up on an aging face. My mom would be so proud.

Anyway, I went up to put on my make up, and it was almost all gone. Akila was kind enough to leave the case, and the foundation, but had taken almost everything else. Not a huge deal, but it was a day when I would really have preferred to have some make up on, since I was leading a training and all!!! And I don't have any spare or back up anywhere, when I have tried to do that, she always gets into it!!!

I am pretty sure she brought it to school, as I can't find it in her bedroom. When she came home from school yesterday, I found a $5 bill in her backpack. Later in the evening I asked her where she got it from and she said a lady at school gave it to her. She must think I am a total idiot. :) I asked what lady and she said the lunch lady. I said that I was going to school today and would ask the lunch lady about this. I also reminded her that I will not get really mad if she tells me the truth so I can return the item to the right owner, but that I will get mad if she lies. She then told me it was Zeke's chore money.

I was quite relieved to find that she had not stolen it from someone at school. Zeke has been a cleaning machine lately, wanting to do chores all the time to earn money, which I am happy about of course. My favorite chore to give the kids lately is folding and putting away laundry, it is their least favorite, mine too. I would rather clean the toilet. Zeke has put his money in a wallet and I keep finding it all over the house. I keep telling him he needs to keep it in the safe or Akila will get it, but he has not been listening. I think he will now.

She should be home any minute, I can't wait to see if she is wearing any make up. It is going to be a fun night!!!!!

Exhausted

I am tired today. I went to bed at midnight after getting a lot of work stuff done. Was sleeping really peacefully at 2:00 until Akila woke me up and wanted to know where the movie case was. I got her some meds to help her fall back asleep and went to her room with her. She was too bored to fall asleep though. A fight ensued. I remained patient, for awhile.

I tried tons of different things to help her calm down and fall asleep. I asked if she wanted me to rub her back or give her a massage. I put her music on, I said I would lay down with her, I said she could come sleep in our room (which I rarely do), I offered rewards for if she fell asleep, I was so desperate to go to sleep that I even told her I would paint her bedroom this week if she went to sleep.

All the while, she is crying, getting louder and louder, swearing and refusing to even close her eyes to try to fall asleep. I think I was patient the first 30 minutes, then I slowly lost it. Michael came up and we tag teamed, for about 10 minutes, then I returned. I was able to get her to settle down (after she had woke Imani up), and I laid down on the bed with her and told her the story about the day we adopted her. We laid there for awhile, but she did not fall asleep. She started to say that she didn't want to close her eyes because she was scared of bad dreams. I prayed with her, I talked about dreams and how they aren't real, all that stuff. Nothing helped. I finally gave up after nearly 2 hours. I went to bed. She went downstairs to watch movies.

I fell asleep around 4:30. She woke me up at 5:40 to ask me if she could sleep in our room on the floor. I said yes. Then I got to listen to her laying on the floor eating something out of a crinkly bag. I finally got up at 6:00, which is an hour early for me and very painful.

The worst part of the entire night, was poor Imani. When I was close to thinking that Akila had fallen asleep, I hear Imani calling for me. Well, I was getting super annoyed with IMANI at this point. Akila was nearly sleeping and Imani was calling my name. I couldn't believe it. I finally went into Imani's room and she asked me in a very sad voice if Akila really wasn't going to get any Christmas presents because she heard dad say this during his tag team turn. She was very upset about this and didn't think it was fair because of Akila's "brain problem".

My response was bad. I said that I didn't know, but that she didn't need to worry about it. I almost had Akila to bed and I needed Imani to be quiet so I could get Akila asleep. I hugged her and told her I loved her, and then I went back to get Akila to sleep. I sat on the floor in Akila's room with my head on the bed, and I could hear sweet Imani in her room crying. I started to cry. Then Akila asked if she could get up and saw that I was crying. I actually thought this might help her to try at least to fall asleep. No luck.

I went into Imani's room, and apologized and held her for awhile. I pray that this is not a start to a bad week. I know for sure it is going to be a rough day, for me at least. I am exhausted.

Today

There is no school today, and the day has gone well I am glad to report. I spent the morning unbraiding Akila's hair, and rebraiding it. I just took a shower, and broke the news to Akila that tonight is her date night. Michael and I are taking her to see Cinderella at the Children's Theatre. She will also get to choose where we eat dinner, and a toy at the store. I was thinking of waiting until an hour or less before we leave, but decided to let the cat out of the bag.

Typically, we have a great time on her date night. She is one on one and has all of our attention, and is getting her way- so her behavior is usually perfect. My nephew Tyler is babysitting the rest of the group and they are really excited about that.

We got the tickets on the Children's Theatre "Pay What You Can" program. I think the way it works, is that a Monday before the opening of one of their productions, you can call the box office and refer to this program. You name your price, a minimum of $1/ticket. Each family can get up to 12 tickets in a year. It is a great deal. I named $10/ticket, which fits into our budget much better than the regular prices, especially if we are taking the entire family.

I will try to remember to report on the night tomorrow. I am really looking forward to it. I always see on this night, who Akila really is. Who she is without all the odd behaviors that are a result of the brain damage. It is really a blessing, but it is also a little sad. It makes me think of how much easier Akila's life would be and what she could do in her life, had she not been damaged by alcohol in the womb. But, I am going to be thankful for this evening and the opportunity to spend good time with Michael and Akila. Thank you Lord.

Patches

Akila has a teddy bear that she is obsessed with, it is a huge comfort item for her. I have tried for years to have her stop taking it or her blanket before the bear, with to places that we go. She is much better lately, it usually stays in the car without a fight. But I have learned that it really helps to keep her calm, so I have stopped fighting it most of the time.

Since we got Hibeam, it has been a struggle to keep the teddy away from him. When Akila is walking around with the teddy, Hibeam jumps up and grabs it and a tug of war begins. It doesn't help that Akila teases him with it and sometimes gives the teddy to the dog. I'm not sure how much life is left in teddy. we have sewn up several holes in him lately, and Ms. Kathy has as well. Well he got a couple of big holes in him this week so I actually sat down this morning to patch him up.

Let me preface this with a couple of facts. First, I am not crafty or creative. Second, I hate trying to be crafty and creative. I don't like to sew or do stuff like this. I admire people who do. Here is my finished product:
As I was sewing, I realized that this patch was a little symbolic. We had a very rough day with Akila on Sunday. She woke up at 4:00 am, and was bouncing off the walls. On the way to church, she was in her super loud mode. Sometimes with her sensory processing issues, she is like this, and it is very frustrating. After church, we had to drive Imani to a birthday party in St. Paul. Akila was just manic in the van. We went out to lunch while Imani was at the party, she was manic. The whole day was just plain tiring. She was so loud, and just did not ever get the message to tone down her voice. So this patch on the mouth, is making me laugh.

And then, look at where I had to put the next patch. I will say nothing else.

My boys

I mentioned that my boys both made the honor roll and were honored last week. Here are a few pictures of the little cuties. In the first one, it is pretty hard to see Hezekiah, but I have a picture of the both of them also.

Honor Roll & Suspension

My boys were both honored at school this morning for making the honor roll. This is a new thing our school has started this year at the elementary level. They got long sleeved t-shirts that say "I am the Definition of Ambition" on the back, and have the school name on the front. They were adorable and I was very proud. ( I will try to post some pics soon)

Then, the call came this afternoon that I have been knowing for years would come. Akila got in a fight after school on the bus, before it left school property. I had to go pick her up. She is suspended for tomorrow and is kicked off the bus the rest of the week. She says that the boy told Imani to shut up so she slapped his face. He pushed her down, she went back at him and they got into a smackdown. Akila is tiny, this boy is much bigger than she is, I love how she has no clue that she has no business hitting a kid that could squash her in a single step.

Anyway, I have told her no computer or TV or fun for tomorrow. Only chores and homework. I anticipate a very problematic day. I am not looking forward to it. She has been having a rough week. Her aide at school has said that Akila has gotten more lippy and full of attitude with her lately, I knew the honeymoon phase would wear off soon, although I hoped and prayed it would not.

After I picked her up from school, I brought her straight to dance class. The entire way there, she was full of attitude and I thought I was going to have to pull over and get out of the van to take a few breaths to calm myself down, but we made it. When I picked her up after dance, she was much more appropriate and knew that she should not be pushing me. She was polite on the way home, and went straight to bed, I was very relieved.

We talked about other choices she could have made when she thought this boy was disrespecting Imani, but I don't think she really gets it. When we got in the van after dance, she said, before I brought it up, "Mom, I'm sorry for fighting with that boy. I just couldn't control my anger". It was a good reminder to me that she needs time to process things, and I need time to control my anger. It was an interesting day- to start the day going to the school for an honor, and to end the day with a suspension. I wonder what they think of me at that school sometimes!!!

Is this week over yet?

Well I sent Akila and Imani to school on Wednesday. Imani had not had a fever since Sunday and Akila had not since Monday night. And neither was acting very sick, meaning that they had high energy and Akila was her regular sassy self.

I got a call about an hour into school from the nurses office. Akila had a 99.3 temp and was complaining about her tummy. I talked to her and told her she could make it through the day. She was definitely not hit as hard as the other kids by the H1N1. I got another call at about 12:30, she had a temp of 100.5. Nuts. I went to get her, brought her home, took her temp and it was normal, and she was acting normal (I mean what is normal for Akila, not the typical brained child). But an hour later, she did have a 99.6 temp.

This H1N1 has been a hard one to figure out. The temp goes away for over 30 hours, and then returns. Looking back, it did that to all 4 of my kids. So Akila stayed home on Thursday, as well as Hezekiah. Hezekiah had no temp since the ER on Monday night, but with his pneumonia, I wanted to keep him around still.

On Wednesday night, I had a little tickle of a cough, very tiny. I of course got paranoid, and for good reason. On Thursday, the cough progressed. By Friday morning, I was a wreck, just in time for all 4 kids to go to school, thank goodness.

I spent the day in bed, with a fever and the aches and chills. When the kids got home just before 4:00, they had free reign of the house as I was at my worst part of the fever. Well, sweet little Akila took advantage. She was being so good, if I had been in better shape (and really cared at that moment), I would have known she was up to no good. She basically went scavenging through the house.

She went into the basement, which she is usually too scared to go into because of the cobb webs, but not now- she was on a mission. She found where I kept the make-up bag. This is a bag full of cheap make-up that I will use as a reward for her. She is so obsessed with make-up and wants to do it all the time, so it is a great reward. She went into several other areas that are where I stash things and got into all kind of junk. Her room looks like a tornado hit it. And still, I don't care.

She gave me the space I needed, and for that I am grateful. She even made herself some scrambled eggs. Michael got home about 6:00 and got to spend the evening cleaning the kitchen and messing around with the kids. I actually cooked real meals on Tues, Wed and Thurs evenings. Thursday, I was feeling rotten, but knew it would be good to be filling the frig with more left overs.

I could not sleep at all last night,and I didn't want to get up and clean or do things that would spread my germs onto kitchen plates and such. I was suppose to get a flu shot today, but I guess I won't be able to. The ER doctor told me that 97% of the flu cases being seen are the H1N1, this is why they're not testing for it.

phone book & med apron

I should probably clear out the memory phone book on our home phone. Akila has figured out how to use it. So I am sorry if she called you yesterday and left an incoherent message about our families flu struggles.

I just got a call from our friend Emily. Akila left her a message yesterday about how sick our family is. Not sure who else she called, hopefully she did not call 911 this time to alert them to our woes.

I have to be intentional about what I wear today, or I have to start wearing a medicine apron, like one from home depot with pockets. I am just walking from room to room, taking temps, giving out meds, juice, having the boys trade being nebulized, and charting all of their meds, fevers, etc. I bought a ton of Tylenol and Motrin last night at CVS so I should have enough to get us through this bout.

I called our clinic this morning and they are faxing in a Rx for Tamiflu for Zeke to CVS. It is kind of weird that I can't get it for the girls, but they don't have asthma. Zeke is the only one who woke up with a fever today, which means nothing I have learned. The really good news is that everyone slept pretty well last night. I was only awakened once by Zeke, so I got good sleep- and they all slept in later than normal. Praise the Lord.

4 kids + crud = H1N1, and 1 tired mom

We have had quite the whirlwind weekend. Started out the long MEA weekend with the kids sleeping over at Aunt Tara's and Uncle Dan's. Michael and I went out to the Melting Pot (my fav), to a movie, and out to breakfast and shopping on Friday. Picked the kids up at 5 pm on Friday, drove the boys to a friends house for a sleepover. The girls and I went to my friend Juli's for a birthday party for her 10 year old, Eva. Imani was complaining of a sore throat and little cough. No big deal.

Picked up the boys Saturday morning at 11 from their sleep over, and Hezekiah was sleeping. He got in the van, and he looked like a zombie. I had been assuming in the friend's house, that two nights of a sleepover in a row had worn him down. As I was driving them home, I could tell by looking at him that he was sick. Got home, took his temp, 104.4. Imani was out running around the neighborhood, playing like nothing was going on. I took her temp, 102. 5. And the fun began.

The two of them were sick all day Saturday, and Hezekiah has asthma so he was making me nervous. I watched him very closely. Sunday morning, they woke up and both had a low grade fever that went away by 9:30 am. Although Zeke woke with a low grade fever on Sunday. By Sunday evening, Zeke's was a bit higher. Imani and Hezekiah were playing fairly normally, but still had sore throats and coughs. I planned on keeping all 3 home today and sending Akila to school. Akila woke up with a 100.0 temp, so they all 4 stayed home.

Imani had no fever when she woke up, neither did Hezekiah. Zeke had a low one, and so did Akila. Imani played normally and was bored out of her mind. Hezekiah laid around. Zeke played, Akila drove me nuts. Is it bad that I am tempted to not five her Motrin so her fever stays a bit high so she lays around quietly? I won't do it, but I am tempted. Just being honest. Hezekiah had been complaining that his chest hurt, but he has not been wheezing, or having any outward signs of breathing issues.

This afternoon, around 3:00, I took Hezekiah's temp again. It was 102.9. He had not had a temp for over 30 hours. I called our clinic. They said to bring him to the ER. I hate the ER. I know that almost everyone does, but I have bad memories of it. When we first adopted Zeke, he was a little preemie who was sick, and we spent about a month at Children's Hospital. Two ER visits for him, one for Hezekiah. About 17 nights total in one month overnight at the hospital. Long waits in the ER, during February, the respiratory distress season. Gives me the chills just thinking about it.

And as much as I love Children's Hospital, their waiting room in the ER, is horrible!!!!! They are opening a new ER in 9 days, couldn't this plague have waited 9 more days? Anyway, Michael came home and Hezekiah and I headed to the ER. Waited for 2 hours. Saw a triage nurse pretty quickly, who didn't hear anything when she listened to his chest. This along, with Hezekiah pleading to leave, and the long wait with a room full of very interesting people, made me think hard about leaving (there were two women with a 3 year old waiting to be seen as a sitter had tried to put hot sauce in the little girls mouth, and it got in her eye. Her eye was a little swollen on the bottom, but that was it. They were on their cell phones carrying on to friends that nobody had flushed her eye out even. Ugh).

So, after two hours in the waiting room, we were brought back. The ER rooms were full, so we were in the Pre-Op rooms. Another long wait to see a Dr. Eventually, we learned that Hezekiah has H1N1, they did not test for it, but said it is pretty obvious. And it has progressed to pneumonia, as they did a chest X-ray. I was very glad that I did not leave earlier.

We were discharged at 8:50. Really, right before the pharmacies close? So I had to call Michael and have him look up the closest 24 hr CVS, and of course, it is in St. Paul. Over 6 hours later, we finally returned home.

Akila's temp was up to 102.something by bedtime, and Imani's temp was back, although it was low. Zeke still had a low one also. It is going to be a very long week. I forgot to mention that Akila threw up this morning once, and a little tonight, although she ate all day. Not sure what that was about. I read on Facebook, that in one 2nd grade class, 10 out of 20 kids were gone today. Hezekiah is in the other 2nd grade class. Crazy.

So, our house is basically full of the plague. I feel like we should put a red sign on the door or something. Stay away people, this thing is crazy contagious.