Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Major whining to follow

By 8:30 today, I was highly annoyed and in a bad mood. The morning was not psychotic, but it wasn't going smoothly. This is spirit week at school, and today is 80's day. This is not a good idea for elementary kids, they don't get the 80's!! Or appreciate it. I pinned the kids pants, the girls both wore my jackets, a letter jacket and a tennis jacket I have from high school (class of 87!!). They looked fine. But Hezekiah didn't like the shirt I picked out for him. I told him to wear any shirt. He got really moody and sulky. Couldn't get him out of it.

As I was making eggs, Raven, the 16 year old I mentor, called me as she had missed the bus. My kids were fighting in the background, I told her to figure something out and that if she was being irresponsible, she needed to find a way to school and said goodbye. I have a meeting with her today at 12:45 and with her school counselor to talk about her grades and credits. Shortly after this call, I realized it was about time for my kids to get their snow gear to head for the bus and Hezekiah still wasn't dressed. I yelled at him to get a shirt on and started yelling at everyone. Then I gave up and said I would drive them to school. I called Raven and said I would give her a ride to school too and to get ready as we were leaving shortly.

The kids were getting their coats and stuff on so I went out to start the van and brush the snow off. Akila was dinging around with the stupid fake nails she was now wearing on her finger nails. I told her to stop it and take them off as she can't wear them to school (she did yesterday as I wasn't on top of it and didn't notice). I finished brushing the snow off the car and the kids weren't coming. I went in to get them and Akila was dinging around with gluing on a nail again. I lost it.

The other 3 kids went out to get in the car, and I tried to get Akila to put the one finger nail down that she was trying to glue on. We ended up in a chase around the dining room table. I thought I was going to blow out a vein I was yelling so much. Michael was up in the bathroom and I yelled up to him to get down if he wasn't in the shower yet. He was in the shower and didn't come. I chased her around the table for several minutes, finally got her, ripped all the fingernails off her and threw them on the floor and dragged her out to the car. It was a proud moment.

When I got outside, with Akila in tow, the other kids are standing outside of the van. The dumb van doors haven't been opening in the cold weather and they have to go in the front door or the back door and climb over seats and get them all messed up. They hadn't figured out to just climb in and were standing there freezing. Got them, and Akila wouldn't buckle and I couldn't reach her since the dumb doors wouldn't open. So I yelled again. She yelled back, which is normal. Except this time, she did something I knew was going to happen soon. She called me a "stupid F-ing mom".

So I of course yelled some more. I told her I would be throwing all the finger/toe nails away today, and that she would be in big trouble when she got home. We then drove to Raven's. Although she now lives in a different place as her mom evidently left and moved to Chicago a little over a week ago. So she is now staying with some random person and sleeping on their floor. Another story that is sad. She wasn't ready when I got there, although I had clearly told her to be ready. So she got yelled at too.

Got the kids dropped off, drove home, picked up Michael and drove up to Brooklyn Center to pick up his car that was stolen and has been gone for 3 weeks. It has taken nearly two weeks to get it fixed. I think our insurance is only going to cover the rental car for the first two weeks, even though it took longer because they wanted a steering column from the junk yard instead of a new one, and it took 5 days to be delivered to the station. And then it doesn't match the right color, and Honda had to order a new cover or something that took 4 more days to come in.

So, the car is finally done. We paid for it, the lady walkie talkied the guy twice. He then said they had to charge the battery and it would take a few minutes longer. It is a new battery. What???????????!!!!!!!! I go outside to wait in the rental car. Micheal finally comes out and says they broke the car and are giving him a loaner. The guy said he broke the handle inside the car that releases the hood. But I wonder if it wasn't something more. So we still don't have our car back.

I was planning on getting stuff done between 8:00 when the kids leave on the bus, and 12:00 when I leave for the meeting with Raven and her counselor. I got home at 10:30, took a shower, and came here to vent. Michael thinks Akila shouldn't get to go to dance tonight for swearing. I said it wasn't fair to punish me and the other kids. Ha. I don't think it would be a good idea for Akila to be home tonight. Not after last night and this morning. Not when I am in the mood I am. Pray that the ride to dance is calm. Pray that I don't yell. Pray that Akila doesn't use the F word. Pray. I am.

(I don't have time to proof or re-read this, excuse me if it doesn't make sense)

Update: 2:45 pm. I got back a little while ago from meeting with Raven and her counselor. I saw Akila and she was sweet as pie to me and seems to have forgotten our rotten morning. I am going to do the same. :) I have asked the neighbor boy to watch the three of my kids while I drive Akila to dance, which will make the drive much more tolerable. A funny thing also; when I got home after the car adventure, there was a voicemail and caller ID showed that the school had called. I was sure I was going to have to go get a sick or something fun like that. It was the nurse's office on the voicemail. My heart slowed down. She just wanted to let me know they were running low on Akila's meds. Whhheeeewwwww.


Amy said...

I am so sorry you are having one of these days.

Can I just THANK YOU for being so honest about it, though? THANK YOU for making me feel normal, because there are mornings I yell and lose it. I feel like the most awful mother on the planet because no one else ever admits they yell and lose it. But there are days my kids are so out of control they don't LISTEN unless I'm yelling, and if for a minute it at least makes them realize they should watch their step because they're about to push mommy over the edge. So though you're having a bad day, you made me feel normal. Thank you. I hope your car is fixed very soon. Big hugs your way.

Christine said...

Sorry for the hard day. I came across your blog from another blogger. I too have a daughter with FAS. Hang in there.

Linda B. said...

I came across your blog from another blog too. I wanted to thank you too, for being honest about your not so good moments. I felt bad for you, but on the selfish side I let out a sigh of relief hearing someone else admitting what I think and do at times too. I have 3 kids with FASD so I can so totally relate! Hanging in there with you-