Friday, May 13, 2011

Wet socks

Yesterday Akila was suppose to be picked up after school by one of the PCA's but she forgot and came home on the bus. She walked in the door and at the same time her para called and realized she had rode the bus home. I asked her to go out to the parent pick up area and send the PCA home to pick up Akila. I was hoping this wouldn't be an issue as sometimes Akila has an issue leaving.

We have not had success with having the PCA's work with Akila in our home. All that Akila does is constantly fight with her siblings and me. And I mean constantly. It is almost worse than having a PCA. So for the most part, they take her into the community and do things with her. They pick her up on the two days that she has dance class and take her to dance class and help her to be appropriate during dance class. They take her to the park, to the library, bowling, etc. I was praying that she would cooperate.

Thankfully, she did. Especially, because the last two plus weeks have been our worst ever. We have been struggling with extremely violent and aggressive behavior. I was so thankful when she left without a fight. Then about 10 minutes later, she returned. She came in the house and asked for $5 to go to CVS. I said no. She has had several rages this week over wanting us to buy fake fingernails. If you have read this blog for very long, you will know this is not a new problem. You will also know that it is not about the fingernails.

We cannot buy her everything she wants. We would be broke. She constantly wants. She expects us to buy her 10 things a day. This is a part of her disability. She does not understand budgets. She does not understand what is fair to the other kids. She does not understand the difference between a want and a need. She literally thinks she needs fake fingernails. She has 8 million colors of fingernail polish. Please do not comment to me about doing her fingernails. It is not about this. Next week it will be about wanting a bikini. The next week it will be needing a tank top. The nest week it will be skinny jeans. Then back to fake fingernails. Always back to fake fingernails. I can suggest until I am blue in the face that she can earn money to buy her own. That does no good. She will rage.

Anyway, she came back, wanted money, I said no. The PCA came in the house, she thought they were stopping back to grab her teddy bear. She told Akila to grab her bear and some Barbie dolls that Akila had "duped" her into thinking they were stopping back for. Akila told her to shut up as she hit me and started to rage. She escalated. It got ugly. The PCA tried to help. It didn't work. She escalated some more. I went upstairs, gathered the teddy bear and barbie dolls, she hit, kicked me some more, raged some more, escalated some more. I came down, grabbed my phone, purse, went to the family room, told the kids to go out the side door and get in the van. Told the PCA we were leaving and that she would be fine once we were gone. She was looking kind of funny at me.

It was raining. I got outside. Hezekiah was standing there in his socks with no shoes. I said to get in the van. He was mad. I started laughing and we drove off. The boys were both kind of mad. I just couldn't stop laughing as they both had no shoes on and their socks were wet. I yell at them all the time to not go outside with just their socks on. They were annoyed with me for laughing and kept asking me why I was laughing because they didn't think the situation was funny. I said it kind of was. They didn't think it was at all. I said you either had to laugh or cry and I was choosing to laugh.

They wanted to know where we were going, I said I didn't know. We ended up at Dairy Queen and they all got a treat, so not a bad deal. By the time I got back in the car, the PCA had texted me that the house was clear and said she was sorry. I texted back that we live and learn. I was glad to get back as the oven was preheating for some lasagna that was all ready. Would have been heading over to my friend Betsy's if I hadn't gotten the all clear text.

I got a call from Akila's special ed teacher today. She was having a tough time in his classroom. She was yelling at him the whole time we were talking. She hung up the phone while we were talking. He called back. She is just losing it lately. Summer is going to be very difficult.

7 comments:

* said...

I.Get.It. Oh how I get it. and I am sorry you have to go through this too.

GB's Mom said...

Shades of MK. I am sorry.

Julie said...

I have to have the PCA's leave with McKenna or we have the same escalated issues...and then we start to run out of free activities to bring her to and then that gets expensive. This whole life is expensive...I am going out tomorrow to buy a large locked cabinet for food...spent $600 at Sam's CLub yesterday and one kid ate about $100 worth of the new groceries and the other stuffed it all in a bag and handed it out to school to try and make some friends. I think we might have some lunch meat left...

dorothy said...

Hugs. not much else I can say....keep us on the list of places you can bring the other kids to visit in a crisis. The house is crowded but we can always fit you in...

AKBrady said...

So with you. Not about the fingernails.

Betsy said...

Glad to hear you would have come over! It would have been a nice break from the constant rain. You are always welcome...even if you don't call first :)

Betsy said...

Speaking of socks...I have a pair of socks for one of your kids from when I was in the hospital w/ Rebecca :)