Thursday, December 2, 2010


We, or should I say, I, am already addicted to our great PCA's. The 5 day Thanksgiving break with no PCA's was torture. We were all losing our mind by Sunday. It was a rough day. Akila was very edgy and quick to anger, and so was I!

Things are back to normal this week, and I am glad. The bummer, is two more weeks and then the two week Christmas break. Gearing up for that right now.

Great news! We got an alarm system installed today. We received a Family Consumer Grant or something like that from Hennepin County to install it. We won't be doing the monthly monitoring contract thing or anything like that. But it makes all kind of noise when any of our exterior 3 doors are opened up when the alarm is set. It is a nice relief. I will update you guys in a few weeks, but if anyone is looking for an alarm system, these guys were great and it was the best price I could find. It is actually the son of Kathy, my next door neighbor/mom.

Last Tuesday, before Thanksgiving, Akila came home from school wanting to invite a friend for a sleepover. Once in awhile, she gets a bug up her you know what to have a sleepover. She really has no friends to do this with. Sometimes, we will have the two neighbor kids sleep over, but that is it. And this does not satisfy her need for a sleepover. She wants to call a girl who went to our school through 3rd grade, Akila is now in 6th grade. She wants me to call her and invite her over. Well, I'm pretty sure this girl would not be interested, from the last time she was over, it was kind of weird.

So Akila perseverated on a sleepover. Trying to think of people. Then she called up her full time para from the school day and invited her for a sleepover. Then she wanted to call the PCA's and invite them. It was not fun. And it made me very sad for her. She just does not understand why she doesn't have any close friends. And she also does not understand, that friends do not want to come over here, to watch her call me a jack a@# and tell me to f@$#! off. It is not enjoyable for other children to watch her hit and kick us, and act totally out of control. I have tried to explain this to her. That she really can't have friends over for a sleepover until she can control herself better. This goes over really well.

And back to the regression I have been feeling with her. I do feel bad for her. It must be so hard to live in her world. To go to school with 11 year olds, who are typical 11 year olds. Starting to get into boys. Listening to music. Having cell phones (still too young I think). She wants all this stuff. But she also wants a children's refrigerator, stove and kitchen set. Like we use to have when the kids were young and got rid of years ago. She wants that, a cell phone, some Barbies, an Ipod, a Baby Alive, some skinny jeans, a doll house. She is so conflicted. She wants to look typical, and do the cool things, and come home and play with barbie dolls.


GB's Mom said...

GB is a lot like that. Her emotional age get further apart as she gets older. I still see progress- but the emotional part makes much slower progress then her physical or cognitive skills.

Jennifer said...

what is a PCA?

Lisa said...

My 17 yo daughter was (is still) exactly like that. Conflicted is the perfect word. At age 15 I had to ban her from playing Barbies because she was so bossy and mean to her younger sisters when they played them together. She would criticize their choices of wardrobe like she was talking to adults. She got very angry and hurt when they excluded her from play (for the above reasons) and then treated them badly because she was mad. I keep thinking, "If neurotypical teens send naked pics of themselves over the internet and cell phones, sext message and bully online what in the world would mine do?" I shudder to think, so no cell phones here until they can hold a job and pay for their own (good luck with that as well!). The gap gets wider between themselves and their peers and they desperately want to look normal. I have been saying that my dd has been wanting to fit in (but not having a clue why her peers do and say the things they do) since about 5th/6th grade. It's so sad on one level, but scary as heck on another. We have tried to protect her from so many things because we have to think of her as 7 or 8, not almost 18, but ultimately, it just makes her hate us.