Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Sisters

On Sunday, Akila and Imani played with Barbies almost the entire afternoon and evening. They played together the whole day after we got home from church and lunch. It was so nice to see. I worked very hard to keep the boys away from them so they could have time together undisturbed. I talked with Imani about it at bedtime and she expressed how nice it was to play with Akila.

Right now, they are playing with Barbies again and once again, I am keeping the boys away. Our neighbor girl just rang the doorbell to play and I sent the boys out and did not interrupt the girls. On Sunday evening, when I was processing the Akila playtime with Imani, I was telling her how glad I was that they were able to spend some quality sister time together, and mentioned how well they seemed to get along. Imani said that Akila had been behaving very well, and that she imagined that daddy and I were very glad that Akila was "out of our hair". I dug a little farther, and what she meant is what I thought. She meant that Akila behaved well and dad and I did not have to constantly mediate and deal with her issues. I said that it was very nice.

What a mature 9 year old to be thinking about her mom and dad. This comment shows the various levels of how Akila's issues affect the other kids. They all worry about mom and dad and can see the stress that the behaviors put on us.

Today afterschool, Akila wanted to make sugar cookies to celebrate fall. This did not fit into the plan and schedule for the evening, and she did not take this well. There was some minor raging. About an hour later, as I was cooking dinner, Akila came downstairs and said she needed to show me something that was not good. She was telling me not to be mad. I asked her if she had spilled, she said no, come here. I followed her up the stairs to find this:

She had kicked a hole in the wall at the top of the stairs. When she is mad, over the most piddley thing, she will stand against a wall or door, and kick her foot against it. This has resulted in a hole in our kitchen wall, a small dent in our frig, a dent in our minivan, and now this fresh dent. I was very controlled, for once. She said that she was mad and couldn't control herself. I talked to her about how else she could have let her anger out, like squeezing the ball in the anger kit, squeezing play-doh, etc. I told her she would have to do several chores to "work off" this damage, and I returned to finish dinner.

This is one more reason why I need to keep plugging away at removing all the wallpaper in our house. When we moved in 7 years ago, the entire house was wallpaper, except for one bedroom. Even every inch of hallway. And when I say slowly plugging away, that is what I mean. I have removed wall paper from one bedroom, one bathroom, and a third bedroom but I still need to remove the glue from the walls and paint it. My next room will be the kitchen. It is a daunting task. I really don't mind painting, I just hate removing the wall paper. And I can't imagine removing it from the stairway hall where the new hole has been kicked. It has super high ceilings and will be quite the chore. I hope to finish Akila's room by the end of November. There, I typed it. Maybe I will do it now.

3 comments:

Torina said...

We have holes everywhere as well. My middle son, who is a relatively calm kid in comparison to the other two kids, likes to bash his big ol head into things when he is upset. Not angry, sad or frustrated or whatever. Leaves a nice ol indent in things. SIGH.

Ellie said...

Can't help you with holes. We only have one - where the neighbor's exuberant toddler threw open a door to go running through the house. I still love my neighbor. But, I do know about wall-paper. I think it ought to be a crime. "Let's see... you wallpapered two rooms... hmmm... that ought to be two years with no chance of parole."

I also know that they make this awful stuff that we call blue goo. Don't know what it is - likely poison. But it takes off wall paper. Dissolves the glue. You can just put it on, and it take a few minutes, or you can rip off all the paper that comes off easily, and then put it on the brown underpaper. Then it easily (I mean that word - use a second coat if it doesn't) scrapes off. It leaves the walls slightly sticky with blueish clumps on, but those wash off with water.

Try it. It is not exactly fun, but definitely more fun than scraping.

Anonymous said...

Maybe Akila ought to remove the wallpaper.