Thursday, October 16, 2008

Should have posted 6 hours ago

Five or six hours ago, I was so pleased. The sleepover went well last night, and today went very well as well. My neighbor friend, DeDe, called me this morning. She is sick and was heading to the Dr., wondered if I could watch her 4 kids. I did hesitate for a minute, and then said what the heck, what's four more? They came just before 11. I fed lunch to 10 kids. It went amazingly well.

Imani's friend, Izzy, arrived around 3:00. Akila had been great all day, with only a few little issues. Imani, Izzy, Akila and Olivia (DeDe's daughter), all played beautifully together for a few hours. It was really fun to watch. It is quite rare that Akila can interact with other kids this well, especially if Imani is in the group. Imani is the sweetest, nicest girl, who shares and is very giving. But Akila is so jealous and has a hard time with it.

DeDe's kids left around 5:30, Noah, Hezekiah's friend left at the same time. I only had to feed 6 kids dinner, and we ordered pizza. We decided my nephew would stay one more night, he is a really sweet and easy boy. I like that combination. Akila's friend Abbey couldn't get here until 8:00, after a soccer game. The four girls played nicely together for over an hour, and then we hit meltdown stage, BIG TIME!!!

I had just put a movie in for them to wind down to, brought the boys upstairs to wind down and go to bed, and Akila could no longer keep it together. Michael and I tried every creative thing to help her keep it together, but it was too late. We spent an hour and a half in her bedroom with her while she raged. She became destructive, trying to break her bed, her dresser, anything she could grab. The 3 boys were across the hall and were suppose to be quieting down and going to sleep, but it would have been impossible.

And it was all Imani's fault; if you listen to Akila. She was furious with her sister, who had done nothing. She was yelling horrific things, like "I'm going to go down and kill her after you go to sleep", and other violent things. It is so hard to listen to that. When she is like this, it does no good to respond to her, or to try to reason with her. She is completely out of whack. But she sucks me in. All I can say, is that it was a long hour and a half.

I did have Imani and Izzy come up to Imani's room to sleep, and had Akila calmed down enough to go to the family room to sleep with Abbey. Abbey even mentioned that this is the worst she has ever seen Akila. Not a fun way to end a day, but I am really proud of Akila despite the bad ending. She was amazingly good for over 12 hours, and that may be a record she has set. I basically set her up, and this is why we do not do sleepovers very often. I usually try to do them when Imani is gone on a sleepover somewhere else. It is a tight rope we walk around this house.


Dinah said...

I know it's hard to focus on the positive when it's the negative that leaves such a surly impression.

If it makes you feel any better, I hesitate to let my bio, healthy brained child have sleep-overs. She can't keep it together socially the next day. Not a rage of course, like our Rads, but just pure sassy and disrespectful behaviors because she's too tired.

Whoever invented sleepovers obviously didn't have to live with the children! :)

Anonymous said...

Our little guy hits a wall when he's around other kids for too long. He's our only, so I have an easier time than if there were others. He usually doesn't get violent or mean, unless he has to stay in the group past what he can handle, so I've learned to watch for the signs and remove him from the situations. Happily, I haven't had sleepovers yet - and I'm not too sure we ever will.

Pat on the back from me to you for surviving a houseful of kids with that going on.