Sunday, June 20, 2010

Another rotten end

We had a good day yesterday, and I am going to focus on that. I am going to focus on that. I am going to focus on that.

Imani is out of town with a friend, and Michael brought the boys to see the high school baseball tournament at Target Field. So it was just Akila and I. We had a great time, went shopping, out to dinner, and to a movie. Driving home, she was really happy. We made a deal to take her meds right when we got home. She changed into some her new clothes, and then the fireworks began.

She refused to take the meds. I tried some compromises, take it in 5 minutes, go play outside for a bit and then take it, etc. Nope, and she went to the red zone immediately. Cursing, kicking, hitting, destroying (she is really into swiping everything off a table, shelf, counter, etc.)- I tried to back off but she was too out of control.

We ended up in restraint mode and it was loud. I am sure that our neighbors are enjoying the new season. Summer means open windows. Open windows means neighbor houses and neighbors passing by get to listen to quite the show. Last night was no exception. I almost wish we had air conditioning more for times like this, than times when it is 90 degrees and muggy.

During one of the many restraints, our doorbell was ringing. I could not get it. It rang several times. I thought might be a neighbor checking in on the hysterics, or coming to try and help. It was that loud. Then the phone rang, and it was one of my neighbors telling me that a man on a bike was knocking on the door (the phone happened to be in reach). I asked her to let him know it was not a good time and that we were in the middle of a rage.

I did not handle the entire rage very well. I kept giving her a time limit and saying that if she didn't calm down by a certain time, she would lose one of the items we bought. This only heightened her rage. I should know this. Threats, and ultimatums do not work, they only make things worse. So, during the rage, I am taking her new flip flops off her feet and saying I am going to take them back to the store. Not the best parenting moment of the day. This is making her more nuts, and she keeps yelling things like, "No mama", "Stop mama", "No, no, no mama". It sounded like I was beating her or something.

And this morning, she is on edge big time. Praying she can hold it together for dad's day.


GB's Mom said...

I know those not-one-of-my-finest-parenting moments. BTDT. I prayed this morning that all our families might find a bit of piece today.

Judy said...

Been there, done that. I'm so sorry for the rough time. All I can say is that I empathize with you! I sent a letter out to my neighbors several months ago just giving them some info on FASD and explaining a little bit about Boo. I don't know if it helped but it makes me feel a little better when he's raging.

I hope the rest of the day is better!

Jeri said...

Makes me glad that we do live in Texas and have to have that air conditioning going to drown out the drama! Sorry to see another member of my club, the "I'm trying so hard to do the right thing but sometimes I am human and will react to the abuse I'm receiving from my child who truly wants to aim it at those who hurt them".

Struggling sucks but knowing there are others out there who at least get it, who believe you and don't look at you like you (or your child) has two heads. Take care.