We have another new PCA who started recently, she is super sweet. She worked the other night and it went really well, Akila loves her. I noticed something interesting last night I want to share.
I blogged in the end of January about some similarities between how Akila has been acting and how an abuser acts. In that entry I shared how after a new PCA had left, Akila turned mean and violent instantly, similar to someone who abuses their wife does. Unfortunately, that PCA from that post is past her honeymoon phase now, and Akila has been pretty rude to her the past week or two.
One evening recently, that PCA, I will refer to her as J, was making mac and cheese or ramen noodles or something like that for Akila. Akila yelled at her through the entire process that she was doing it wrong. It was very similar to how she yells at us. The next night, the newest PCA, I will refer to her as L, was making mac and cheese. Akila started to tell her how to do some part of it, and then was being really sweet, saying "It's OK, you're doing a nice job" and smiling. Akila was very sweet and supportive of L who was doing the exact same thing J had done the night before.
They had a great time, played with Polly Pockets, colored, played on the computer- it was great. Then L said goodbye to Akila at the end of the shift and came into the dining room to fill out a timesheet. Akila went up the stairs to my bedroom where Imani and Hezekiah were watching TV. I was standing at the bottom of the stairs and I could see Akila in the door of my room. She started to yell at the kids, and then stopped and asked if L was gone yet. I said no, so she stopped and did not go off on the kids anymore.
It was very similar to the episode in January with J, where she did not want her to see Akila get rude. Last night, she did not want L to see her being too rude.
Akila has always been like this, where she gets comfortable with you and is more willing to let loose. Just so interesting to watch so closely. It use to take her close to 6 months to get use to someone where she would let them see her behaviors. I do wish the honeymoon phase was longer like it use to be, it is so hard to see your child being so rude to someone else, even if they are getting paid (minimally). I do love our PCA's.
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